


it's the terror of knowing what this world is about

by euphrasiepontmercy



Category: Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (TV)
Genre: Gen, taking the "david was a theatre kid" backstory from ep 5 and RUNNING with it, the povs here are kinda all over the place so i'll just call it third person omniscient
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:28:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28294566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphrasiepontmercy/pseuds/euphrasiepontmercy
Summary: so david's backstory is fascinating (i CANNOT WAIT for him and emily to be regulars next season) and i need an episode of zoey helping him through his internalized toxic masculinity; this is the product of that as well as a study of the relationship between tori and her oldest cousin. title from under pressure by queen
Comments: 4
Kudos: 3





	it's the terror of knowing what this world is about

**Author's Note:**

> includes references to hello dolly (because now we're trying to mix in s2 canon wooooo), the phantom of the opera, she loves me, les miserables, and seussical

_ “It’s so nice to have you back where you belong!” _

The door to David’s room slammed open. Jumping off of her perch atop the bed, a seven-year-old Victoria hurriedly set down the hairbrush that had served as her microphone, and her oldest cousin hastily hid his own at the sight of his sister. A teenage Zoey was standing in the doorway, seeming absolutely fed up with the karaoke session that had at this point gone on for hours. She held a well-worn book in her hand, and clunky headphones were placed around her neck.

“Some of us are trying to do homework,” she sighed, and lifted the book to read from it. “‘Against my will I am sent to bid you come in to dinner.’ Appropriate for the situation, don’t you think? You guys can be heard through the walls, and your dad”-she turned to her cousin-”is just beaming. He’s saying that if you keep up your lessons, you’ll be the next Bernadette, whoever that is.”

Zoey entered her brother’s room and picked up a white half-mask that had been thrown onto his dresser. Picking it up, she held it to her face incredulously, trying to find out how it was meant to be worn, and this produced a snicker from David.

“What?”

“It’s just-that’s what she does in the-Meg Giry, she-the show ends with...never mind.”

Zoey shook her head and smiled, taking her little cousin’s hand.

“Tori, your parents have got to stop dropping you off with us, or you’ll soon pick up David’s unexplainable theatre obsession along with my awkwardness.”

“But I like it here,” the girl laughed, “and there’s no one else at home to sing with.”

“See, Zoey?” David said with a smug smile. “I am  _ clearly _ the best babysitter on the face of the planet.”

Zoey grinned and swatted at her older brother with her book, causing their cousin to dissolve into a fit of laughter which gnawed at the back of the young woman’s mind.

_ Does she ever get to spend time with kids her own age? _

“Okay, you...whatever-the-musical-award-is winners. Dinner is on in five.”

“Thank you, five!”

Zoey rolled her eyes at her brother’s obnoxious grin and closed the door.

A few seconds passed in silence before the remaining cousins grinned at each other and Victoria reached over to once again press play on the boombox, squealing with delight when the overture to  _ She Loves Me _ blasted out of it.

\----

A decade later, that overture would become a huge part of Victoria’s senior year of high school. The small lobby to the even smaller auditorium was bustling after opening night of the school’s production of  _ She Loves Me,  _ held by a shoestring budget and a few very determined students. Most passionate of all of them was their young Amalia Balash, whose whole extended family had come to see her opening night.

Well, not the  _ whole _ family.

“Where’s David?”

Victoria’s eyes were sparkling with hope and fatigued exhilaration as she scanned the room for her cousin, and although Zoey had barely taken in the two hours she’d just spent sitting in a dark auditorium, she wanted that sparkle to last as long as possible.

“He…”

The girl blinked, and her mind-which had been running a mile a minute for the past two hours, no, the past two weeks-quickly put together her inability to spot David in the crowd and the hesitancy in her other cousin’s voice. She looked down at Zoey- _ since when has she been taller than me? _ -and her face began to fall. Zoey sighed.

“He couldn’t make it, Tori. I’m so sorry.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, he just said-”

“Well, it’s fine, there are four more shows, I’m sure he can-”

“He’s not coming.”

The rush of Victoria’s speech slowed and stopped, and her train of thought screeched to a grinding halt. She stared down at Zoey, blinking away tears for a few moments before being dragged away by her parents, who were already providing compliments and critiques of her performance.

Zoey watched as she took in each remark, her eyes hazy and not really listening, before breaking away and joining a group of her castmates in their 1930s finery. After promising to meet them later for dinner, she turned back to her older cousin, her mind in a million places at once as she tried not to break down.

“Did he say why? Zoey, please tell me-”

“I don’t know, his new job takes up a lot of time, so does his girlfriend-”

“The one who said she’d rather die than be subjected to  _ Les Mis? _ I don’t know if Emily is really-I mean-”

She cut herself off, as if remembering herself under her aunt Maggie’s gaze, and took a breath. Her voice lost its bitterness, which was replaced by a storm of self-judgement.

“I shouldn’t have said that. She’s very smart, people have different interests, it’s just…”

Maggie nodded and took her niece’s hand.

“You miss him, of course you miss that part of him. We do, too.”

Zoey, unsure of how to handle the situation, escaped to the concession stand and made a purchase.

When she was presented the sympathetic and congratulatory gift of a tiny carton of vanilla ice cream, Victoria laughed through her shaky breaths and hugged her cousin tightly.

\----

The younger cousin’s arrival in San Francisco during the summer of 2020 had turned out to be both a blessing and a curse, for sure, but Zoey was far more aware of the blessing as she lay awake one night. She distantly heard Victoria’s voice as it drifted from the kitchen; she must have been on the phone.

“Hi, Davey.”

There was a pause, but no other voice came. Victoria took a breath and continued what was apparently a voice message.

“You haven’t answered any of my calls for the past few months, so...it’s been a while since we’ve talked. Zoey and I will see you tomorrow at your parents’ house for dinner, and I’m really looking forward to meeting the baby...tell Emily I say hi...love you.”

She hung up and sighed. A few moments of silence passed before Zoey’s own phone lit up next to her. Her eyes widened at the sight of her brother’s caller ID.

“What is it? I have to be quiet, you know she’s staying with me and will wonder why you didn’t pick up.  _ What is going on?” _

“I just don’t know what to do, Zoey. Yes, she’s staying with you, so you should just tell her I’m busy. Because I am. That’s it.”

“David-”

“You remember what I told you last spring?”

“Yes.”

“Emily and I did talk through it, and things are better, but everything feels so much more real now that he’s actually  _ alive _ and  _ in the world. _ People...people are cruel, Zoey. I don’t want him to go through what I did, and Tori’s so idealistic that she doesn’t understand that.”

Zoey sighed and shifted her position, sitting up in bed.

“I totally get that, but...times are changing. Would you rather have your son stifled as someone he’s not?”

There was silence on the other end.

“She misses you too, David. Just talk to her.”

“All she wants is to go back in time. I had to grow up.”

“Are you insinuating that she hasn’t?”

“No, not at all, I just”-Zoey could picture him fatigued, frustrated, running a hand through his hair-”I don’t know how much time we should spend together.”

“This is your  _ cousin.  _ She’s 23 years old, and believe me, I’m having a hard time believing it too, but she’s her own person and she knows what she wants in life.”

More silence.

“I know.”

“She’s not wrong, either. David, there’s no shame in appreciating a good story, and I’ve learned lately just how influential music can be.”

Zoey took a moment, trying to let her advice sink in.

“Your son deserves to know that too.”

“I’ve got it,” David said with a small laugh. “Since when are you so philosophical?”

“Well…”

Zoey trailed off.  _ Yes, I’ll tell him. Eventually. _

“2020 has been quite a year.”

“Amen to that.”

She laughed.

“Goodnight, Zoey.”

“Night.”

\----

_ “There’s a faraway land, so the stories all tell, somewhere beyond the horizon…” _

“What’s that?”

Victoria’s voice trailed off of the lullaby to answer Emily’s question.

“Oh, it’s...just a song from this cheesy little show that every high school does,” she explained softly as she held her second cousin, biting back the idea that  _ the show is actually surprisingly clever and creative and _ -“I thought he’d like it.”

“Well, considering that there’s not much singing in the house that he’s growing up in, I don’t think you’d be wrong.”

Victoria smiled, and her soprano floated smoothly back onto the melody.

_ “If we can find it, then all will be well. Troubles there are few.” _

Zoey was curled up on her parents’ couch, taking in this new development. The relationship she was witnessing had gotten better over the years, and a sort of admiration had grown between the two women.

_ “Someday we’ll go to Solla Sollew, Solla Sollew.” _

Zoey startled at the sound of strings slowly building in as her brother made his way down the stairs. David’s voice was quiet and nostalgic as he looked at his son. He held each note as he made his way into the living room, and Victoria looked up, surprised.

_ “Solla Sollew, Solla Sollew.” _

Although the instrumental had come from nowhere, confirming the event to be a heartsong-yes, her power was unmistakably back and in full swing-neither cousin was able to tell whether David was also singing in reality. There was a possibility either way, but it didn’t seem to matter; the baby in Victoria’s arms was reaching out to his father and beaming, and the expression on the young woman’s face was indescribable.

_ He’s back. _

She slipped into the higher harmony that she knew quite well after years of community productions and handed the precious bundle to David, who sang to his son with a tenderness that reminded Zoey of the first heartsong she’d heard from her own dad.

_ “Solla Sollew, Solla Sollew. Solla Sollew…” _

Victoria stepped back, feeling that it was right to leave them to their moment as David sang the next few lyrics of the lullaby.

_ “I’ll be home…” _

There was a pause.

_ It’s almost the end of the song, there are two words left- _

Emily looked up from where she was standing at the kitchen table, her eyes assured and hopeful, and the last two words came from her.

_ “...with you.” _

As she took her husband’s hand and they leaned into each other, a soft minor chord rippled through the air, ending the heartsong. Victoria didn’t realize that she’d been crying until she felt a cold drop leave her face;  _ he’s back, he’s back. _

Zoey turned to her and smiled. In her younger cousin’s face, she saw a glimmer of the seven-year-old who’d been the siblings’ favorite babysitting charge all those years ago, and the memory brought her back to that day she had barged in on their karaoke session-

_ “It’s so nice to have you back where you belong.” _

_...So that’s how it sounded so familiar. _

She patted her cousin’s hand and nodded, trying to keep back a laugh in order to not disturb the previous moment.

“I’ve got quite a story for you.”

**Author's Note:**

> i hope y'all enjoyed that, next up is another episode of Simping With ToriTM (edit: it has come to my attention that "second cousin" wouldn't actually be the correct term, but "first cousin once removed" really doesn't flow as well so yknow what it is what it is)


End file.
